Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Run # 365 Tuesday December 31st

Happy New Year Hashers!!

Just a heads up for something a bit different - there will be a Hash Run on New Years Eve (ie TUESDAY) - so take a deep breath, grab a beer & sit down, for TA has written the details for this one...

(NB For those that can't/don't want to make it or wish to absolve your boozey festive season sins twice, there will also probably be a regular low key Monday run - more details on that one later...)

The New Years Hash (Not a Monday Hash)

Hares: Dr Tightarse TA H3 and Dr Octopussy
Where: The Sunset Airport Resort and Bar and Medical Centre
20 Napier Terrace, Broome
(opposite Magabala Books)
Theme: Doctors, Nurses and their victims, I mean patients.
There will be prizes for the best dressed!!
When: Tues 31st Jan - Sometime around 6pm or when Dr Faucet makes his house call, till sometime next year.
Food: Will rummage through the hospital bin for something tasty, plus of course jelly and some other shit for vegos.
Entertainment: The Karaoke machine (Ok maybe not entertainment but it will make you hope that midnight comes sooner). Unfortunately Dr Tightarse TA RA H3 won't be the RA so there will be hours to kill....
Drinks: Drinks will be included until 8ish or until Dr Bargearse GM H3 calls last drinks. BYO drinks after that.

Medical: Dr Cock in Frock H3 Has volunteered to do free Breast examinations, with any follow up as required
Cost: Only $20. Includes shit run, great nosh, entertainment, drinks during and post run.

The Fine Print: Most of the aforementioned Doctors don't actually have any medical qualifications.
This will be the place to be as there will very long waits in Emergency on New Years Eve.
If you need to be at some other shit place post Hash, there are several showers available to wash off the blood, sweat and down downs.
There is room for swags and tents on site.
There is a post run hydrotherapy facility although we are unsure what color it will be on the night.
The run will have easy options, so what better night to introduce a friend or two to Hash?
There might be, although unlikely that there will be, a recovery run.
It is very unlikely we will really bother with a prize for the best dressed but there maybe something if you don’t bother getting dressed…
If this email/post is swallowed, please seek medical advice


Monday, December 23, 2013

Run # 364 December 23rd

Happy Christmas Hashers!!!
in the wise words of Faucet...
Hares: Faucet and Pokeherhontas
Where: 10 Stewart St
Theme: Well its Xmas so I first thought we could all come as Jesus but that could cause conflict with too many hash personalities. Then I thought Nativity scene characters could be good but then thought we'd struggle to get 3 wise men and a virgin so in the ended deciding no theme, just come in hash gear and think xmasy thoughts
Other stuff: towel, torch, money
Time: Run starts at 6.00pm as I should already be there.
Food: yep and vego stuff if we still have vego people?
OnOn HoHoHo

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Trash # 363

Padam and Pink Bits. Sounds more like an innocent title for a kid’s picture book. Unless you know them then it’s totally opposite. The run started off in Roey with a hint of promise and then deteriorated quickly into another shit run. Not enough checks too much tape and a backwards facing fishhook. There seemed to be more walkers than runners for some reason. It was a short run which is welcome by some in this hot humid weather and then a Hash Holt outside a hanger at the airport and a short on home. That bit was entertaining when one of the girls tried to jump the gate but got stuck on top of it as it swung open (as it was actually unlocked). Back at the Circle, Dirty Bitch volunteered to run the show and proved she could do as shit job as any of the guys. It was young Slurge’s 50th run which is quite a feat but then I suppose he’s from good stock. Cough Cough! The hares took their traditional down down for setting a shit run and then Dirty Bitch dragged out the two virgins which see seemed pretty excited about. One had come with a friend but the other had come alone. Such bravery, or naivety.  There were charges for weekend antics which won’t be repeated in print. You need to be there to hear what goes on. We had one visitor from over east, Frequent Flyer who was at Hash with his mummy and daddy and then before we knew it the Pizzas arrived. Wow Pizza! We hadn’t had that since last week. Maybe were evolving into a Walking Club with a Pizza problem? Never. On On til next week and Xmas.

Monday, December 16, 2013

Run # 363 December 16th

howdy Hashers,

our lovely Padam has sent through sketchy details of what is sure to be an entertaining run

"42 planigale loop for shittest run ever, pink bits and Padam on fkn on"

so a translation for those of you new to the list (are you aware of what you're in for?!
check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hash_House_Harriers)

Hares: Padam & Pink Bits
Where: 42 Planigale Loop, Roebuck Estate
When: Monday 16th Dec, 5:45 for 6pm run
What: $5 to run, $5 for dinner, $3 beers

and so in the gentle words of PADAM...


christmas cheers
Inseminator :)

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Trash # 362

Well if you go on holidays and we know you’re coming back then there’s a good chance someone will dob you in for a run while you’re away. Thanks Quickie. And Crackdiver.  As expected it was a shit run but it was actually a run but no need to elaborate on that ey Quickie. I must say it was a bit of an unusual run as Padam and associates were late as they had to stop and save someone’s life and wait for the ambulance before they could ride on to hash and then when running past the accident scene on the run we had to help lift the patient onto the stretcher and then Faucet was seconded to drive the ambulance to the hospital. We’re just that sort of community group I guess. Apparently there was a halt and a sweaty run back to Doggy and Quickie Park. Tightarse was contracted to do RA duties and did so in a somewhat speedy fashion as the pizza turned up and I assume he was hungry. The hares as per tradition went first and made a competitive effort to down their charge while impeded by the pipe. Tightarse who embraces the use of a butler decided to give the task to both Incontinence and Nutcracker which at first seemed a little improbable but they ended up squeezing into the jacket and being on of the best Butlers we’ve ever had. Obviously everyone has a purpose in life. Backpage got an ice chair for something and then ended up with a slightly excited bearded no name hasher on her knee. He politely held her new shoe for her as she drank her beer from it. There were several charges as well as a few media down downs. Faucet was briefly given an ice chair for his repeated media appearances having briefly overtaken Cracka for media exposure. There was also a naming following Saturday nights hospital party with Poke Her Hootas, actually its Poke Her Hontas but I’ll leave that autocorrect mistake in as it makes the blog seem slightly humorous. Go Poka! And just in case the GM and Poke Her Hontas don’t get enough height comments we made them pose for a photo but no free drink. That was about it really and then we ate Pizza and crapped on and drank more beer and went back home to our normal lives.

Trash # 361

We should really know better but if yet let Slowcum set a run then there’ll be something strange about it. It appeared a normalish sort of shit run except for a short squirt down and back a short street which lead back to a hash halt. It was here Slowcum proudly showed everyone the route on his phone (please note the spelling of route as it is Slowcum’s phone we’re discussing). He’d set the run in the shape of a penis and

balls. Mr Google Maps would have been proud and the Roebuckians disgusted. We assumed it was based on Slowcum’s tackle as it was quite a short run. Back at Circle Central, Faucet was forced to wear the pink gown and pretty hat and try to keep the rather large crowd in control. It was a bit of a special night. Firstly we had to celebrate Cockinafrocks 150th run. One of the few men to get that far. It was also Fanta Pants’s 50th Run. Slow and steady but she finally got there. We were also doing a fund raising run for Perky who was going to shave her head for Breast Cancer Week. Part of the fund raising was Cock allowing people to buy waxing strips to mutilate his body. Ill talk about it later as I’m feeling a little ill thinking about it. We dragged out Slowcum, Slurge and Gurge to show our appreciation of the run. I suppose it could be called a cock of a run. No,no, shit run is fine. Isn’t it pathetic that spell check doesn’t offer an auto correct or option for the word shit. Sorry. We gave Cock and Fantapants the best seats in the house in recognition of their achievments. For some reason the ice stuck to Fantas arse. Slightly weird. We had one vigin who seemed quite lively, a few returnees who had lame excuses, some media charges and generally a random assortment of shit charges. We had a shoe drinker I recall but no photo but we do have one of Slowcum doing a Double Thong. A first for Broome Hash and I’m guessing a first for Hash anywhere really. The big draw card for the night was the dehairing of Cock. Its not the first time he’s done this so I’m a little curious how much he really cares about breasts and how much he derives a certain pleasure of having mainly w

omen ripping waxed strips off his naked body. Whatever does it for you I guess? The one stuck across his nipple seemed a bit dubious but I noticed the strip only had hair on it after the rip. Despite a poorly done wax, red welts and a chainsaw that appeared from somewhere he managed to raise almost three hundred bucks which we added to the run money so we sent off a total of $500 to Perky which was great. Well done
Cock. We should set a run in your honour. Oh, we did. Good. Speaking of good or slightly even gooder, Gurge had put on a huge spread which was scoffed down heartily amid waxing stories. Another shit night.

Monday, December 9, 2013

Run # 362 December 9th

Hare's Crack Diver and Quickie (Not sure she knows about it yet!)
Venue Pelcan Gardens, off Herbert Street
I should imagine there will be some food and probably you will need a torch.
Limited information due to lack of communication ability in the Kimberley.. large distances between us, no phones, or internet sometimes we use telepathy but you all know the go, so see you there usual Broome Time Emoji

Follow Broome H3 on Facebook just ask and we will add you to the group.

On On Barge

Monday, December 2, 2013

Run # 361 December 2nd

Righto Hashers it's time to dig deep in your ever-generous pockets!!!

Tomorrow's run is in honour of our beautiful Perky (who now lives in Cairns, but will always be a Bluewater Hasher!) who is shaving her locks off to raise money for the National Breast Cancer Foundation. The cause is close to our hearts as I'm sure many of you know someone who has been through the fight against breast cancer and particularly a wonderful Broomie (Theresa Bengston) is currently fighting the fight as she goes through radiotherapy in Perth.

the lucious Cock-in-a-Frock has offered his hirsute self up for our pain inducing pleasure, so you can pay to rip hair from his buff body, or for the faint-hearted just put as much as you can into the pot for Perky. She's not far away from raising $5000 so we'd like to have a crack at tipping her over the edge!! (oh hang on, she's a new mum, it's probably already happened!)

So run details...

Hare: Slocum (so help us!!)

Where: 155 Sanderling Drive, Roebuck Est.
What: fundraising Hash Run - $5 run fee will be donated, plus waxing money & whatever else you can afford to chuck in!!

Slocum is being cagey & not offering too many more details, so just do whatever works for you ;)

on on
Inseminator :)

Trash # 360

work in progress