Thursday, September 26, 2013

Run # 350 SUNDAY September 29th

No run on MondaySept 30 due to it being replaced on this rare ocassion by the 350th run on Sunday

Monday, September 23, 2013

Run # 352 September 23rd

Hola Hashers!!!

this week is Mexican Theme, so get your sombreros & panchos & nachos & muchos out & join us for a Corona or two (or five if you're TA!!)

Hares: Cumma Sutra & NN Bonnie
Where: Cygnet Park, Roey Estate

When: usual usual

On on
Inseminator :)

Monday, September 16, 2013

Run # 351 September 16th

Howdy Hashers,

it's that Shinju Matsuri time of year, which means we drag out returnees and virgins to make it a huge run to celebrate the festival of the Pearl. Derby Hash will be there in fully fine form, and there will be plenty of beverages... (that sounds like a cause & effect, but perhaps of the chicken & egg sort?!!)

What: Broome Hash #351 Shinju Run
Hares: Barge, Faucet & Camel Toe
When: Monday 16th Sept
Where: Bedford Park (between Anne/Weld/Hammersley Sts)
Costs: $5 for run, $5 for dinner, beers $3, soft drinks $1

What else: nothing, just be there. bring torches if you like, or don't - whatever. Bring unsuspecting virgins too.

NB Those particularly bright ones out there might have noticed that we've jumped from run #349 to #351. Ok it's happened before & been a typo, but this time it's because we're messing with time & holding off on our 350th run until the Long Weekend. Keep Sunday 29th Sept free for an afternoon (& evening!) of celebrating just because we can.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Hash Trash #345

[insert horse noise here] Welcome to the Broome Hash House Harriers Cup where a bunch of dodgy runners invades the Broome racecourse under the cover of darkness to run a bouquet relay team event in race attire. The race was of course won by the slutty harlet Beep Beep in a time that would have beaten the half of the horses the next day. Others ran walked and cheated. Hippy shagger was caught out cheating badly while Saddlesores and Faucet carried out the same manoeuvre with much more panache, only to be dobbed in by the walkers who by chance were walking around the track in the wrong direction.  To add an air of authenticity to the meet, Tightarse was offering hormones and dubious urine samples which was quite amusing considering he follows the Swans and not the Bombers. Bargey had the whip out, in some premonition of what was to come at the AGPU the following week. There were two new namings with Karma Sutra and Aids finally being christened by R.A.Slowcummer. And the food was, umm it will come to me in a moment, yes it was umm its coming yes it was Pizza. Shit Run. [insert horse shitting noise here]

The Trash # 344

 Some runs are memorable for just one thing; in fact, some are even famous for just one thing. Crackdiver, Quickie and Octo, sorry but your run will only ever be remembered for this.

Hash Trash #343

Sometimes artistic is mixed with autistic such as the case of the Streeters photo. All literature has to open with a sentence of sorts and in this case this is it. It may have been a while ago but I remember this run like it just happened the other two months ago. Scrotum Tennis, Octopussy and Superturd. Courthouse Carpark. Remember now? No of course you don’t because hardly anyone turned up you bunch of last f-ing slackarsers. It was actually a good run an despite being cold there was a nice fire in the carpark to stand around and Scrotum Tennis hadn’t stood around scratching her balls, she cooked up a huge feast of really yummy food which we all gorged on and then had leftovers to take home. It was Cockups last run or so he said. The love of the Kimberley or the love of a woman will see him back here one day. I remember there was a big circle drawn on the ground but not enough to fill it. The pic shows the talents of Turd and Scrotes as they drink with skill from the pipe. I’m sure Octo has other talents. Slowcum was RA and the guy from Darwin who random appears did so again. Padam drank from his shoe.

Hash Trash #348

Hare's Tightarse, Hippy Shagger and Razor Tits

My firstborn is missing. I was made to carry it for the whole run. Making sure the unique markings weren't smudged, it's skull cracked or, that it wasn't thrown in the frustration of a circle of palm trees that – annoyingly – had tape on them all.
There were moments when the long grass had hashers leaping through fields like rabbits, dogs disappeared, and the hash apprentice, Slurge, was felled by barbed wire, that I had doubts about taking my egg child out into the trail.
The GM sat on hers. Others were discarded on the run. Halfa cracked his on a Turd.
And then at the end of it all, I handed it over to Monkey / Incontinence and it was never seen again.
The run: the ribbons were of no particular colour, arrows were spray painted on the mud and hash markings stopped in lieu of a box that said 'go to Miller Park'. That was where the circle of palm trees with ribbons split the pack. On home along Frederick for most, a trip down Tang Street for the brave.
There was a hash halt with a photo in a drain.
The circle was long. The RA pole-danced. Virgins were aplenty, one drank out of his shoe. He even said it's the best thing he's done in a year. Faucet put his nuts on the candelabra (the Michupinchu stone is still AWOL).
Warwick Slang's Bitch and Yamashita Suckerfish got ice chairs for leaving us for a year. They recollected their fondest hash memories – SuperTurd and WSB's one (known) naked night together, Yama's first run at Westpac and AT's.
Slops got her 50th and celebrated by getting beers for everyone. These are not free hashers, you still need to pay for them.
Quickie got a birthday cake, she's just finished the last of it 3hrs after getting home. In the shower. She can't wait for the next hash birthday.
Dog fight club still isn't licensed, but Matso and Pumpkin are on the fight card. Quickie has the book, give her your money next run. Kosta licked the cheese. The cheese that everyone had in their burgers. He licked it first. There was also a mouse.
We claimed a Derby hasher – Thumb Wank. He said he'd tell us all of Derby's secrets via text.
Can someone keep an eye on Camel Toe, Herpes and Cherry Popper? Down downs before the run next time. Can't trust them to stick around for the circle.
Beep Beep and Saddle Sores survived the Kununurra Adventure Race.
The med students are back again. Rumour is that the hospital orientation includes hash as a social activity.
Dinner was burgers and pizza. 40 odd hashers caused an impromptu pizza order. Insert joke about faster pizza delivery. There was Frangelico and Jagaemeister shots.
The fried eggs in the burgers were a nice touch.

On on

Monday, September 9, 2013

Run # 349 September 9th


you may feel a sense of deja vu (?vous? who even knows how to spell it?!!!) here because it seems that TightArse didn't get enough of Slocum's spectacular pole dancing efforts last week, and so he's backing up to be Hare again!!!

Hares: TightArse & Padam - now there's a recipe for disaster!!
Where: Airport Resort Sunset Bar & Grill or whatever TA calls his house. cnr Bagot& Napier Tce opposite Magabala BooksWhat
When: usual usual

What - who knows? something to do with eggs, poles & beer.
don't say I didn't warn you....
On on
Inseminator :)

Monday, September 2, 2013

Run # 348 September 2nd

Hola Hashers!!

Warwick Slang's Bitch & Yamashita Suckerfish's last Broome Hash run (for 12months anyway) will be held at:

Hares: TightArse & Hippie Shagger (& possibly Razor Tits?)
Where: Airport Resort Sunset Bar & Grill (Napier Tce opposite Magabala Books)

When: 5:45 for 6pm

Bring: torches, but no egg cups required.

Pole will be painted for those keen to dance.

On on