Wednesday, August 15, 2012

The Trash # 293


Harriets: Camel Toe and No Name Emma.
Virgin harriets Camel Toe and No Name Emma lived up to expectations – it was shit. They must have been hungover, or their minds preoccupied by what dress they would wear to the Ladie’s Day races. That’s the only excuse we could think of for their shitty effort of a 7km loop around the heart of Broome. There was a check or two (apparently), and a fishhook to keep hashers minds on the ball. Somebody mentioned that the most exciting part of the run was crossing the road from one side of Frederick St to the other. I bet they were slightly disappointed when they had to cross back soon after. The virgin harriets learnt a valuable lesson too; set your run too early or in the path of automatic sprinklers and maybe nobody will find it. On this particularly shit run, that was actually a good thing as hashers made their way ‘on home’ via a shortened and ad hoc semi-live run strung together by Camel Toe. But enough about her and the shit run, they’ve had enough attention already.
The circle was back to some of its old form with Butterbitch taking the lead as RA, and Cock-up making an increasingly rare appearance. It’s about time we had a hasher present who knows how to work that damn bugle, but we didn’t get the opportunity to act out ‘Swing Low’. Maybe on his next appearance. We had our first naming in a while. Many naming options were deliberated, and after dismissing the usual sexually driven possibilities we almost got a sneak peak of her party (? Bedroom) tricks. In the end sex won out and Topless Rentals was named in traditional hash style. Perky copped a down down for her potential final run in Broome. I mean, what reason is there to stay around after you’ve had your face posted on the front page of the Advertiser. Slops, Muscle Puller and Jiggy-Jig also graced us with their presence and joined Cock-up for a returnee down down. I bet they regret that now. Simply Meds showed his face at the blue water hash for the final time and enjoyed the ice seat in true hash style.

He thanked the Broome hash mob for the good times he’d had over the past months, which led to a second down down for unnecessary sucking up. The ice seat was soon relinquished but needed a new victim. The perfect opportunity to put the spotlight on a hasher completing his 50th run. Did I mention how shit the run was? Warwick Slang’s Bitch hit the milestone and was informed that he would receive nothing for the dishonour. Apparently the GM is a little slow on the uptake!!
Nosh was an improvement on the run, but that wasn’t until we got the BBQ figured out. This shit run ended on a high, as we were told that next week’s hash is by Stork.
On On.

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