Friday, March 25, 2011

RUN #221 28MAR

Virgin Hares-Guzzle Guts & Tinnie Arse
Venue-9 Forrest St Cnr Louis, Old Broome
Time-545pm leave 6pm Food & Drinks
On On Barge

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Run#220 The Trash

I have fucking jury duty. How bad is that? As if I don’t have enough to do in my life without having to sit in a chair all day listening to waffle. I write waffle, I don’t want to have to listen to it. I planned my week around not getting picked and I ended up being the very last one chosen. I explained to the Judge that I had an important hash blog to write but that didn’t work so I suggested he read it to evaluate my mental state but he wouldn’t be in that either. I did see Vagrant sitting there working. How boring must that be? Enough about me, I’ve had my whinge and feel better now. The run was set by the students who study meds. I think Celine being the only named one. It was a long run. I was a tad late so I did the first part with the walkers and the last part with the race horses. People like Spec, Fluffer, Butterbitch et al are machines. There seemed to be a lot of shortcutters towards the end but hey, can’t blame them for that. Huge turn out in the 40’s and a nice large green venue for the circle. After the traditional critique of the run it became the Stealth Show. Yes, our youngest 50 plus runs hasher is about to leave home. It became a night she probably won’t forget. It began with putting her in an iced chair in the middle of the circle and then any reason Butterbitch could come up with she ended up getting doused in beer. People caught on fast and dumped on her. It was also a big night for Conchie who reached the big one hundred. Like half of most people’s down downs he ended up on Stealth’s lap. Some guy with hairy armpits gave the famous couple a large freshwater toast which was almost caught by the famous photographer Bogger. Well done Conchie and Stealth and hey, Butterbitch, you neglected to mention it was your 50th Run so we’ll have to get you next week. We had a heap of Virgins and several namings. Warnie, for the phone sex girl, Some reference to another masseuse which I can’t remember as well as Pussy puller and Pussy something else for the two people who just happened to be named on the night silly names were being handed out and Aunty Jack who actually looks just like Aunty Jack but I didn’t want to say anything in case he ripped my bloody arms off. (*Young people laugh here, even though you don’t get it). The judge is calling, I have to go. The food was great although you had to be a vegetarian if you stood around talking to people for too long. Lots of baby lamingtons which made me a little sad as we just ate them with out thinking about the fact that they will never make it to be big lamingtons. Yes your honour, I’m coming.

Friday, March 18, 2011

RUN #220 21MAR

Virgin Hares-Med Students +(Celine),
Venue-33 Weld St, Old Broome Meet 545pm leave 6pm
Food & Drinks Torches On On Barge

They migt know their way around a lower intestine but will they be able to navigate the streets of old broome??

Be there!

Two minute noodles for ALL!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Run#218The Trash

Not to sure who St. Patrick was but I’m sure he’d be proud to have over 40 people dressed in green stuff, running around the streets and beaches of Broome trying to catch two young lads called Cockinafrock and Urinal. The boys set a live run which went well even if it was a fucking long way. Actually I have to take that back as I just checked it and it was only 5.5kms plus onbacks. Maybe I’m just getting old. Come to think of it I did turn a year older that day, but then I didn’t come in last either. There was a very memorable moment when we were running along towards town beach and we suddenly got hit with a cold breeze. There is a photo of it but it doesn’t quite have the same effect. Nice photo by the person I gave the camera to. I think I’m losing it a bit as I can’t remember who that was or even who ran the circle. There was Red and Slowlane and I think Butterbitch did a lot of the talking. I think we are going to need crowd controllers soon. Barge and someone from Scrubs had a media drink as Cracker was off on a photoshoot somewhere and Wombat and Jackoff gave us an update on the Tassie Nash Hash, We had about 10 virgins turn up, most of whom were med students. Not something I studied when I was at school. The Inca stone wasn’t available (where are Anal and Westpac?) so they danced around an old orange which may have been a tad unkosher. Isn’t there some thing about the orange and the green in Ireland? It was good to see that dressing up was the norm and most people made some sort of effort even if it was just wearing a potato and that bitch Uranus wore a flasher potato necklace than me, The down downs were decidedly dodgy with some green stuff which I’m guessing was a green version of Matsos famous Ginger Beer. I just had a quick google and read that St. Patrick died on the 17th of March 461 and is buried in a place called Downpatrick. A bit eerie to be sure. It also said he used the clover to preach the holy trilogy. You know, the run the beer and the food. Speaking of which there were also cans of Guinness available to wash down the lads homemade Irish stew and mashed potatoes. Slang brought a friend and sold some shirts and hats. And what was the thing where Muppet, Red and Stealth sneaked off to the beach. Stealth is leaving us soon but maybe we can keep a jar of her.

It was a great night except for the fact that Yamasittasuckerfish had her bike stolen. Hopefully she’ll be back next week with her bike returned.

Saturday, March 12, 2011


Hares's Urinal & Cock in a Frock not virgins!

Paddys day theme, wear green/potato sacks/ anything irish so says Urinal

Cock in a Frock has no idea where its from cause he hasn't let me know, so I'm guessing its the Clementson Rd turn off to Demco Reserve (not easy to find unless you know it but its just past the bend of Dora and the start of Clementson.

ed. It's a Rotunda and yes it is in front of the Derby Export Meat Company Estate.

Urinal has promised some Guiness & Pie but who knows what we might get!!

Its also going to be a Live Hare run! Which means that they take off before us and mark the run as they go and we have to catch them-if we do which we shall of course then they have to buy us a Slab. If we don't then they still have to buy us a slab! Win win really so you have got nothing to lose but come along and look like an idiot in a potato sack. Urinal has not told us where we might get a hessian sack in Broome perhaps he gets them imported?

Also Slang is setting up a merchandising stall on the night to sell shirts & caps so bring along some extra dosh.

On On & Cheers


Friday, March 11, 2011

Run#218The Trash

Well there’s usually always a highlight at Hash, often the welcoming of the virgins or a naming and Monday was no exception, so for a change I’ll start this week’s blog with the naming. I actually thought the name Celine was a bit lame for someone whose middle name is Dion but with some Irish ingenuity Urinal brought meaning to the name as he sung the Celine Dion song from the Titanic. The setting sun, the wind off the ocean in our hair and Urinals hauntingly beautiful voice transcended us to the deck of the fateful ship. Down down down down Broome Broome… Maybe it was one of those times you had to be there. Now to being there. Gantheaume Point. More than 20 of us, which is a record for a public holiday Monday, turned up for a Red Muppet run. For those of us who had been lured by the promise of Pina Coladas we were to be sadly disappointed. Obviously Red had little to do with the run part as it was actually a set trail through the scrub along the dunes of Minyirr Park. It must have been set by Muppet who had obviously made it safely through the dunes without her medical backup team. There were copious trees of pink ribbon to follow and then a long on home along the beach. Back at Circle Central Butterbitch lead the proceedings admirably and was handing out down downs for any reason he could think up. Softcock was back from wherever it is he goes to for the wet and Bogger, who’d got a lift to the beach, was in the circle for her little jaunt, leprechaun hunting in Ireland. As to be expected Sausages were the evening sustenance. There was some grainy bread for the health conscious, plastic cheese for the dairy component and tomato sauce as the vegetable. I do believe there were vego sausages on the bbq as well. The sausages were cut up into little bits like my mum used to do for me when I was little. Oh and yes there were lollies for sweets. All of this served up in one of the most beautiful locations in Australia if not the world. And only 5 bucks. What a bargain. Photos. Perky.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Run# 218 March 7th

After much too-ing and fro-ing Muppet and I have decided to reprise a couple of our more collectively memorable runs.....

Gantheaume Point (on the beach) (we won’t run on the rocks)

Strap your child to your chest!

Food (of a sort) and Pina Colada’s

Starts at 6.00pm Come Hell or High Water.

Muppet has promised not to collapse though we will have some ambos with us in case and I won’t lead her off into the bush!


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Run#217The Trash

Now what do I do? I dumb down the blog and everyone tells me how good it was. I can’t write through virginal eyes for ever, particularly not at my age. So stiff, back to my able, acute, alert, alive, all there, apt, astute, brainy, bright, brilliant, calculating, capable, clever, comprehending, creative, deep, discerning, enlightened, exceptional, highbrow, imaginative, ingenious, instructed, inventive, keen, knowledgeable, original, penetrating, perceptive, perspicacious, profound, quick, quick-witted, rational, ready, reasonable, resourceful, responsible, sharp, smart, thinking, understanding, well-informed, wise and witty normal blog. I could delve into the thesaurus again to describe the last run but hey, it was plain good and if you were there you would know that. Slang and Faucet set a great run around old Broome and Chinatown that made most people comment that it seemed short but thanks to our friend at map my run it was exactly 4.97 km without any of those on backs that most people fell for. You gotta love that. And the 50,000 litre footpath at the end was pretty popular. Two of the girls, Quickie and Stealth joined the 50 Club and now have engraved mugs to impress their friends and make their parents proud. The parents of the 4 virgins may be a little less jubilant if they’d watched their sons do the Broome Can-can. May have been better if they did the whole thing underwater instead of just the last bit, although the singing was far from melodious. There were a few people in the pool, most notably Barge who tried unsuccessfully twice to push Faucet in the pool on his own. Somehow Slang and Booberator never ended up taking the plunge. Cracker was there for her usual media appearance and I heard Perky mentioned a few times but didn’t see her take a down down. AT was the RA which obviously only makes sense to hashers. And the food. Well no cursory one liner about that. We had Booberator back in action slaving away, cooking pots of great curries complemented with poppadoms and the entire rice supply of a small Asian city. There was almost a stampede to the door to get started with food queues backed up into the darkness. There was plenty for those wanting 2nds and 3rds. Now is probably a good time to go back to the start of this blog and say that variety is the spice of life and not all runs have to be great or every meal fantastic. Come next week and you get Red telling you to run to the end of the street and back and then Muppet serving up sausages and chips. Hey, it’s all good. Be there. Opps, the photos by Puller. .