Sunday, August 30, 2009


Monday’s run

31st august 2009
5.30 for 6pm start



Starts from

1 Mary Street, Unit 6

Hares: Slang & Half Arsed

Friday, August 28, 2009

Run #138 The Trash

Well as long as you knew where AT and Westpac live then you would have been able to find the start of this weeks run. Sort of a dodgy run. Hung around the primary school for a while looking for marks in chalk that the kids probably rubbed out. Then off through the scrub following the join the flour dots until we saw the light. It was a big red one. Discovered where lots of the illegal backpackers camp and where they go to the toilet!!!!. Down along the airport road and then a long on Home. Just to show there’s no editorial censorship in the Trash I was made to do a down down for going to Bali and getting a root. Last time I tell Cockup anything. Another girl, who’s name escapes me at the moment admitted to being on a self imposed snogging ban for one month, which raised a few questions. Half-arsed and Slang sneaked off together after the meal. Mmmm what sort of people do we have in Hash?
The down downs went well, without a drop being spilt and shit they were cold. One virgin and a couple of returnees. Muppet gave Cockup a cool down with a mug of chilled water. Not sure what for but he probably deserved it. Good to see Maestro back even if it was only for a cheap feed. Speaking of food. Great fried rice. If you weren’t there then you missed out. Actually there was so much of it you could probably still call in and have some now. A few stragglers stayed on until only the Peroni’s were left and then called it a night. On On til Monday.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009


Photos: Sammy on the loose, above. Hashers Conchie, Two Dogs and Viagra ready to Leg it for Sammy in 2008 Shinju Float Parade.

It has become a new Broome tradition that BH3 helps Sammy the Dragon during Shinju Matsuri (Festival of the Pearl). Basically you become a Leg and run around creating fabulous Shinju magic in the giant Chinese dragon called Sammy.
Leg training is Tuesdays & Thursdays at 5pm on the Civic Centre lawns (until Shinju, which starts on friday september 4). Sammy will be appearing in the Float Parade and opening and closing cermonies.
Without enough Legs, Sammy has to stay locked in the civic centre storeroom :-(
Your Legs are needed - more Legs are needed!!!!!

Photos: Commando ready to roll, above ... Meanwhile Barge Arse wasn't a Sammy Leg. Instead on such a hot day she dressed up in a tight rubber outfit and paraded behind some other club's float. (s&m float?)

Monday, August 24, 2009

RUN #138 24AUG

The story so far......

(transcript of communications intercepted over the last few days...)


Just in case you didn't get Cock Ups email, like me and Muppet, Monday's run (24th August) is from AT's and Westpacs somewhere on a corner of Swift and Goshawk somewhere in Roebuck, we think.

On On


Hey Westpac & AT
Didn't you want anybody to know where the run is-double down downs!!

Subject: Re: August 24th Run?
Date: Wed, 19 Aug 2009 12:08:58 +0800

hi barge,
yeap we are still good for the run, just havent made our mind up where to start. probably at our house , but i will talk to mark and confirm with you is that ok?

Date: 08/18/2009 09:25PM
Subject: August 24th Run?

Hi Guys

Are you still ok for next weeks run? If so where and I will send out the pidgeons!



hound dog - stop humping all night

read - leave the books alone - there is only so much knowledge your brain can absorb

pussy - put the dog out and come play

maestro - move away from the piano - and show us your tune

arse about - bring your elton

westpac - u betta be there coz it is at your place - which you will be

commando - stop fighting them on the beaches and come due to the 'burbs!

effin - who the ef is effin??

quickie - by name and nature

andto all thos others who are missing in action ....

get off your arses, get off the couch - monday night tv is for intellectuals - not hashers!

onnnnnnnnnn onnnnnnnnnnnnnn

HI hashers,
Last week saw a pack of mainly harriets (13) run almost the full length of Minyurr Park. One of the hardest runs we have had to pick up the live trail with plenty of checks. A good run Barge and Bob. If we had 2 more harriers we would have run out of Grog so Shrink is on notice that she was very close to a down down.
By the way Cock up did deliver the ice.
We had 4 turn up to Directors filming on Wed night. We all enjoyed the prawns, champagne, anti pasto, thanks Director everyone else missed out!
We are in the Shinju events calendar!!!!!
Now get off your arses
Lets' all turn up for the sake of your health!!
Ones missing last week
Concsi out of town
Alpha babysitting while Consci out of town
Booberator we are missing you get a new job
Kamakaze we run on Monday nights
Slow Lane you should have Matsos running on its own by now
Snob, just being a snob
Fawcett in Hollywood
Oral test driving canoe
Wombat cant make up her mind
Shrink out testing new beers using a new puppy as an excuse down down
Anal Tool party party party
Westpac cleaning up after the party party party
Vagrant vagrant get rid of the kid for the night you need perantal relief
Knowing Westpac and Tool the nosh will be good too!!!!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Run#137 The Trash

Well, unfortunately I was unable to make the run last Monday night so I can’t write about it so instead I thought I’d dedicate this week’s Trash to my excuse for not turning up. It was my cousins 50th birthday and he was having a party at his Villa in Bali. He sent his private jet over to pick me up so I found it a bit hard to say no. You would be happy to know I took my runners and Broome Hash shirt with me and participated in part of the Hash run on the Monday night. The drinking part! In fact I participated really, really hard and am still paying for it. I‘m sure you would have all been proud. You can see in the photo how I was having trouble deciding which beer I wanted as I boarded, Maybe I should have taken Shrink along with me.

Actually Bali apparently has a popular Hash group. Unfortunately my timing was wrong but if anyone is heading over that way keep it in mind and check out their website. Running around over there would be great. If you can go by private jet it is always much nicer. You get red carpet when you arrive in Bali and you skirt around all that immigration and customs crap. It’s only a two hour trip so you don’t get much drinking time. I finally made a decision and went with a Crownie.

I realise this will earn me a down down but I should be able to drink again by Monday.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Run #136 The Trash

Well last Mondays run will have to go down as the best hash run ever. Not just because I helped Quickie set it but because I write all this crap and I can put whatever I like. Jokes aside it was a good run and a great turnout even though we were missing a few of the regulars like Kama, Cockup, Read, Booberator and Director. Over 20 people running backwards and forwards through the bush around Roebuck Estate, Blue Haze and the Rodeo grounds. It was a 5 km walk or about an 8 km run for all those suckers who took all the long onbacks. Well done Conchie. Unfortunately Mr A.Tool the hornblower was taken out by a sidewinder cruise missile while calling on the pack.
Back at Quickies we had the circle led by Slow Lane who christened a couple of Virgins and charged Half-arsed and Barge for being wankers in bright red shorts. The enforcers had an easy night as most people were able to put away their down downs as we were all pretty hot, sweaty and thirsty. We had home made sausage rolls and a nice healthy salad with pine nuts! A couple of slackers, namely Shrink and Muppet, just turned up at the end for the food and drink.
As the hares, Quickie and I had a great time setting the trail. It is fun trying to work out how to catch out the older and/or faster hashers and make the bastards run harder.
If you haven’t set a trail yet then have a go, just ask on Mondays after the run and get someone to help you set it if you prefer. The food can be a flash or as simple as you like to make it and is paid for Westpac.
Next week at Barge’s there’s a spa. Does that mean it’s going to be a hard run? OnOn

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Run #137 17AUG

Monday’s run

17th august 2009
5.30 for 6pm start


BRING BATHERS-Will Heat up the Spa!

Starts from

23B Slater Rd, Cable Beach

Hare: Barge

On On!!

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Run Mon 10th August

Monday’s run

10th august 2009
5.30 for 6pm start


Starts from

6 Lorikeet Dve
Roebuck Estate

Hares: Quickie and Faucet

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Run #135 The Trash

Well Kama and his bitch Slow Lane sure know how to draw a crowd. Twenty eight was a pretty big turnout. It was definitely a great tour of the Roebuck Bay foreshore including the Caravan Park. Up a dune, through the scrub, a few false trails around the poo ponds, into the light industrial area, back through Demco. Then a second Caravan park tour through the PCYC where we had to avoid people throwing punches and then a bloody long on home. We had Visitors and Virgins and even a few birthdays. Muppet would have forgotten to mention hers if a friend hadn’t dobbed her in. A couple of others then got brave and suddenly remembered they were having birthdays too.Why be shy, you get a free beer and people sing to you.
We had a naming with Quickie christened on her knees by Kama and Slow Lane adding the holy water.
Speaking of Holy Water, We now not only have critiques of the run but I heard Shrink the grog girl giving someone a run down on the hops content of the beer. Bloody hell what are we, a bunch of beer drinking experts now? Actually I guess we are. Keep up the good work.

On this run once you had chosen one of the 15 different beers available at Broome Hash you got to sit in the local Park and enjoy a real local delicacy, a Matso’s Curry. Thanks Slow Lane. In closing I must give credit where it's due. Shrink brought just the right amount of beer which was pretty good considering the big turnout, Can she do it again next week!

Monday, August 3, 2009

RUN #135 3AUG Breaking News!!!

*5.30 FOR 6PM START*
Cock Up Please bring Hash Table and Light


Run Mon 3rd August

Monday’s run

3rd August
5.30 for 6pm start


Starts from Bedford Park
Mecure Car park

Hare - Kama